Here are a few tips:

1. Use carrots not sticks. Dangle them freely in front of your son or daughter. Here are some carrots:

a. A visit to a very beautiful, cool, hip, intensely smart, highly reputable college. Do some research first to make sure it aligns with their interests and personality. Once they see it and feel it, talk to them about what’s going to be needed to get there.

b. Sit down together and design a travel adventure, one that will appeal to their interests and dreams. Have a budget (it doesn’t have to be big), and tell them it’s a graduation gift, redeemable when they are accepted into one of the colleges on their list.

c. Discuss major or career ideas, and try to get them excited about one or two. If they have no idea what they want to do, they may feel disconnected from their studies and feel as if it’s all a waste of time. Career Connections make great carrots.